Feeling Good About Your Partners' Relationships: Compersion in Consensually Non-Monogamous Relationships

Abstract

Compersion is a well-known term in polyamorous communities that connotes the positive emotion an individual may experience in relation to their partner's relationship with another partner. We know little about this emotion or about the factors that facilitate or inhibit its expression. The lack of a standardized measure for compersion has likely contributed to its neglect in the empirical literature. We sought to remedy this gap by creating a reliable and valid quantitative scale, The COMPERSe (Classifying Our Metamour/Partner Emotional Response Scale), through a multi-stage, bottom-up process grounded in a qualitative understanding of consensually non-monogamous (CNM) individuals' lived experience of compersion. This paper describes the thematic analysis of qualitative data (n = 44) which underpinned item generation, revision of the item pool based on researcher, practitioner, and community member feedback, exploratory (n = 310) and confirmatory factor analyses (n = 320) to ascertain the factor structure of the data, and examination of convergent and divergent validity. Results supported the use of a three-factor scale (Happiness about Partner/Metamour Relationship, Excitement for New Connections, and Sexual Arousal), which demonstrated excellent internal consistency as well as strong divergent and convergent validity.

Keywords: Compersion; Consensual non-monogamy; Emotion; Jealousy; Polyamory; Relationships.